For any woman, undergoing surgery for breast cancer is a devastating experience. Not only are you confronted with the possibility of losing your life, but the removal of your breast brings about a sudden and distressing change in appearance.
Related treatments such as chemotherapy and hormone therapy, which lead to weight gain and hair loss, make matters worse.
As Diane and Fiona found, regaining your confidence can be a real struggle, but it's possible to look good and feel self-assured after breast surgery.
After a mastectomy, the majority of women will feel attractive and confident if their loss of a breast or breasts is not obvious to others. What you wear underneath your clothes is just as important as your clothes themselves. A good breast form and the right bra are essential.
Wear the right breast formProstheses come in a wide variety of shapes and sizes, and when it comes to selecting the right one for you it's important to look for one that is not only a match for your remaining breast, if you've undergone a single mastectomy, but also your lifestyle and requirements.
Generally speaking, there are two main types.The 'insert prostheses' (as worn by Diane) fit inside and are supported by your bra. The second type is the 'contact prostheses' (as worn by Fiona), which stick directly to your chest wall. The latter feels most like a natural breast because the weight is held against the body. It also gives you more choice in the types of clothes you can wear, as it requires a less supportive bra.
If you lead an active lifestyle, have a large bust or lymphoedema, then a lightweight version of one of those breast forms might be the best choice for you. Above all, it's important to remember that breast form products are continually improving, both in terms of look and comfort. To ensure you have the latest information on what's available, visit the
Breast Cancer Care website for comprehensive advice about prostheses.
With breast form prices starting at around £85, it's worth knowing that the NHS offers all its mastectomy patients free post-surgery breast forms and fitting.
It also offers complimentary reassessment if your prosthesis is no longer suitable, as a result of a change in your weight or shape. And it has a replacement service for prostheses damaged or worn out in the course of normal wear, which, generally speaking, is every two to three years.
When you do need a replacement, remember to take a look at what's new on the market, rather than directly replacing the one you already have.
For private patients, your health insurance scheme may cover the cost of your prosthesis. If it doesn't, then you can cut the cost by signing a form stating you've had breast surgery, and thereby avoid having to pay VAT.
In both instances, your medical team or breast care nurse will be able to advise you where you can get a fitting, be it with a specialist retailer, a breast form manufacturer or, if you're eligible, with the NHS.
It's also worth noting that Breast Cancer Care offers a free fitting service for all women, available at venues in London, Glasgow and Edinburgh. As for replacements, if you're entitled to NHS treatment, ask your GP to refer you to an NHS breast clinic so you can be fitted with a free prosthesis.
Wear a good fitting braAs if losing a breast or breasts wasn't hard enough, worrying about accidentally exposing your prosthesis is a constant concern for women who've undergone a mastectomy.
But most problems with 'wandering' breast forms, or 'gaping', are actually caused by ill-fitting bras. For example, a bra that's too big may cause your breast form to move around within the cup, or to ride up when you raise your arms. A bra that's too small will squash your prosthesis, causing it to protrude and possibly even pop out.
To ensure your prosthesis stays firmly in place and out of sight, you should regularly check that your bra is the correct size. Many women continue to wear the same size bra year after year, forgetting to take into account even slight variations caused by weight loss or gain. Most high street department stores and lingerie shops offer a complimentary bra-fitting service. Some even offer a specialist postsurgery service. Before you hit the high street, phone up and find out.
The majority of women state that one of the most upsetting aspects of a mastectomy is that after surgery they're unable to buy feminine, sexy underwear. They're forced to choose from dull ranges of hefty mastectomy 'pocket' bras with thick straps that limit their choice of clothing.
Having to wear these items or to throw away their presurgery lingerie reduces many women to tears. But this needn't be the case. Once you know your correct bra size, then you can select any normal bra style, as long as it offers the following features:
- good separation between the cups
- a cup that encases the breast form securely
- a structure that supports the breast form fully and comfortably
Obviously, half-cup styles such as balconette bras wouldn't be suitable. But, with the advent of contact prosthesis and lightweight breast forms, a far wider range of underwear is now available to women post surgery. Nowadays, even strapless bras, providing that they encase the breast form and offer adequate support, aren't out of the question.
A specialist surgery bra fitter will be able to advise you on all the styles available to you.
Underwired brasThere's lots of confusion about the suitability of underwired bras. If you wore this style of bra before your surgery, you may be able to continue to do so, as long as your scarring has healed, which usually takes a period of 12 months after surgery, and you feel comfortable.
However, it's always best to check with your breast care nurse or specialist postsurgery bra fitter. Underwiring will help support the breast form, but it's important to make sure that it sits on top of the wiring. If the cup is too small, the wire will press on the breast form and will eventually damage it.
Again, for more comprehensive advice about bras and fittings, visit the
Breast Cancer Care website.
So how do you dress to look good after a mastectomy?After breast surgery, it's common to feel less attractive. As Fiona and Diane showed us, the sudden and enforced change to your body shape can lead to a loss of self esteem and confidence, which in turn affects your body image.
Many women, even previously confident and stylish individuals, respond by covering up more, hiding themselves beneath dark, baggy shapes and layers. Clothes shopping for your new body shape can be a distressing experience. Summer clothing, in particular, is difficult. As for undressing in public, the very prospect of communal changing rooms is enough to deter some women.
The key to regaining your confidence and feeling good about yourself is to stop focusing on your 'problem' area. Many women develop a distorted body image, believing that their breast loss is far more visible to others than in reality it is.
But, with the right breast form and bra, you can be confident that no one will know, unless you tell them. Don't be afraid to show off this area.
Fight the urge to shy away from revealing necklines and eye-catching accessories. If you're concerned about high scarring or lack of breast tissue on your chest wall, then get a friend whom you trust to take a long hard look at you in your clothes and give you an honest opinion. You may be surprised just how much of your décolletage you can reveal before anything untowards becomes apparent.
If you've fallen in love with a dress or top but the neckline is too revealing, don't reject it out of hand. Make it less plunging with a brooch, or by wearing it with a camisole or vest top underneath. Alternatively, have a tailor raise the neckline so that it's high enough for you to feel secure. It may be an extra expense, but the boost to your confidence will make it well worthwhile.
Also, experiment with cowl or boat-necks. You'll find that these styles afford plenty of cover, but are far more flattering than traditional high necklines.
Like Fiona, many women experience weight gain following their treatment for breast cancer, either due to enforced inactivity while they're recuperating, the bloating effects of drugs, or metabolism changes brought about by treatment-induced menopause.
If you experience these changes to your body shape, it's important that you buy clothes that fit you properly, rather than thinking of yourself in terms of a particular dress size.
Make sure your clothes skim rather than cling. Squeezing into outfits that fitted you before your treatment for breast cancer will make you look like too much meat stuffed into a sausage skin, and displaying visible rolls of fat is not a good look!
Above all, don't despair, even if you can't beat the flab, you can conceal it. Like Fiona, opt for wrap-overs and dresses that create the illusion of a waist, particularly when the ties are bound at the side. Or try the empire line style, where the focus is on the breasts with the fabric skimming over problem tummy areas.
Clothes made from delicate fabric are a good choice. There's always some movement to them, so they provide a clever added distraction. Similarly, ruched tops will work well. No one will know if it is the fabric or your flesh that's making the waves.
When it comes to trousers, opt for flat-fronted styles with side fastening. These will hold in the tummy, with no fuss at the front to bulk it up. Alternatively, opt for low-waisted jeans that are one size too big. These will hang loose around the waist, making it look like the jeans are too big for your embarrassing secret. It's simply a matter of finding styles that hide rather than accentuate your faults.
As we showed with Fiona and Diane, the key to dressing well after a mastectomy is to accept your limitations and make the most of your good points. Your body shape will have undergone changes and you may not recognise it, but don't become fixated with your shortcomings, real or imagined. Just as you have problem areas, you will still have assets.
Looking good is all about taking a long hard look at your body and dressing to show off what you love and hiding what you love less. The loss of a breast or breasts doesn't have to mean that you have to conceal your body's good points under layers of dark clothing.
Dress to be noticed, not ignored. Showing off your assets, be they shapely legs a curvy figure, fabulous shoulders or striking colouring, will draw attention away from your vulnerable areas.
As Fiona and Diane discovered, women who've had breast surgery can still look gorgeous and be self-assured.
